Temporal, Zygomatic, Buccal, Mandibular, Cervical.

Dear Guy at Union Station,

Science, and by science I mean a quick Google search and some shrugging, tells me that it takes anywhere from 26-62 muscles to smile. That same science tells me that to lose 1 pound of fat, one must burn about 3,500 calories. For a 155 lbs person, that would take about 6 hours on a treadmill at a speed of 5 mph, or roughly equal to the land speed of a Loxodonta africana, the African Bush Elephant, when height is directly compared. Walking on said treadmill would also engage the use of around 94 muscles in your basic human person.

So no, actually, turns out I’m not too fat to smile. And doing so for your sake? Would not have helped me lose any of the weight you felt the need to shame. Though walking past you may have helped me burn off some of the anger and sadness I felt at the thought of letting one asshole who felt his opinion deserved breath ruin my night. That feels pretty paleo to me.

Thank you, Guy at Union Station, for all that you do. Especially for your insights into the complex world of weight, appearance, worth, science, social acceptance, shame, and what an elephant would look like on a treadmill.

It. Was. Magical.

Love,

Teagan

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A Theatre Of Their Own

Dear Geena Davis,

I never know if I’m making the right choice when I pick a TIFF film, and thanks to a visit from my friend L for her very first festival movie ever, my worry was cranked up to 11. I wanted the experience to be fun, and had my fingers crossed that this Canadian world premier would deliver.

Once the announcements and introductions and commercials and sponsors and reminders were over, the lights dimmed, everyone settled into their seats, and over the first images and sounds of them film, I heard your voice. I relaxed so quickly, I heard bits of my DNA unwind; I knew we were in good hands.

Thank you, Geena, for all that you do. Especially for your brilliantly sharp line delivery – I have never felt so personally inspired while also feeling like I needed to leave the theatre immediately to learn archery.

It. Was. Magical.

Love,

Teagan

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2pm TiLT – Oct 21, 2016: My ears are still around my shoulders

I’m a GO Train commuter. It’s a large percentage of the reason I’m longing to move into the city, just so I don’t have to plan 2 hours for my ride to or from anything happening in the city. The TTC, as awful as it is, at least runs 24/7, and lets my constant anxiety about making it to Union before the train leaves disappear.

Today, I saw two passengers physically go at each other. And it freaked me the hell out.

I don’t live a life of violence – I’m a white girl from the suburbs. The closest I’ve been to danger is the fact that my hometown is where bombs were made for WWII. When confronted, which is rare, I either Use My Words, or walk away with a sense of embarrassed failure. I am not one to choke out a bitch because she wouldn’t stop singing or talking on the quiet zone of the go train.

But that’s exactly what happened.

I’ve never seen so many people throw their hands up to hit the emergency bar, ever. I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen it being used for its intended purpose: most people smack it while stretching and then freak out when a crew member shows up with a defibrillator. People are SERIOUS about this quiet zone – it’s a weird little sanctuary for those who have spent a long day in the city, and want some quiet on the way back home. But I’ve never seen anyone come to physical blows over something like this.

There is no doubt in my mind they both knew down to their bones each of them was right. And I don’t fall on either of their sides, it was so outside of my experience that it was like watching a strange movie where I was somehow audience and participant. And while I’m a fan of the Quiet Zone, I don’t think I’ll ever experience it the same way again.

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2pm TiLT – Oct 20, 2026

Today I Learned That it’s hard to stay in your lane, when you see others doing a task you think should be yours. Sadly, I am not talking about ice cream cake. Work, as much as I love it, has presented some challenges I’m striving to meet.

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2pm TiLT – Oct 19, 2016

Today I Learned That pasta.

That’s it. 

Just pasta.

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2pm TiLT – Oct 17, 2016

Today I Learned That sometimes, all I need is a few hours with this sleepy dork to make my day better.

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2pm TiLT – Oct 15, 2016

Today I Learned That warm baths and stretching are your friends. Who knew burlesque would be all about the core strength.

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